Reflections.

I feel sick.

Woke up today to a very weird dream. I was talking to brother lingkang via email but somehow it was voice mail. LOL. Doesn't make sense to me. He was telling me the minutes of the messages over this year's family church camp. HAHAHA weird much yeah?

Went to bM's house today for December Retreat. Was rather disappointed that there were only thirty odd people. Sure 'bout the number and it didn't run over forty. That's kinda sad. But oh well, God doesn't look at the number, but the faith. Yep, we had a nice time of fellowship together. Although the numbers were way smaller, but I'm sure we got the chance to say hi to almost everyone. :)

So well, the time now is 10:40 pm, on the 31st of December 2011. I'm not sure what time I'll finish typing this but right now I can say that it's only less than 2 hours before the clock strikes 12:00 am, 1st January 2012, and I'll really, really officially be a sec four.

I remember last year how I took a few hours to come out with a list of resolutions for the year of 2012 but I have failed to keep them for barely even a month. So this year, I'll not make any resolutions. Instead, I'll just type down the only thing I wanna do and improve for the coming year. In every little small decisions I make next year, which will be tomorrow onwards, I want to keep close with the Lord always. And by that I mean every day, every moment of my life. And it includes doing my Quiet Time every day faithfully and willingly. No doubt it'll be hard, but I need to start learning how to commit every single thing every single day in my life to God and trusting that His way is the best for me.

If what of 2011 I've rememebered that has thought me was that I'm of weak faith and I rarely put my trust in Him. Even if I did, I did not trust Him fully. I acted almost everything of accordance to my own will, on my own strength and on my own logic. That made me backslide a lot. Horrible.

Yep, as usual, I commit every 31st December to reflect on how I've been in this passing year and there's really too much I've done that have shown I've been a really bad testimony. I cannot confidently say that I've done my best for Jesus, neither can I say that I've been a good Christian because I've been a rather two-faced Christian; behaving one way outside church, and behaving another in church. Terrible.

I'm feeling sick, think I've not been eating much. Vegetable.

HAHAH if you actually noticed Horrible, Terrible and Vegetable at the end of my previous paragraphs :B

Alright. Anyway, I guess that's all for my short reflection post.

Bye :)